You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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