you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
