bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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