I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
