I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
