i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
