Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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