hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
