we're blogging at a bar
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize