I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize