why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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