If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i just had sex bonerless
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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