my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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