O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
