Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She's the barista slut.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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