The maid of honor just puked.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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