meet me or not, i'm out of control
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
