I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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