I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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