what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
