Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
