I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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