I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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