Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We are all done wearing pants today
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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