I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
one might say we're banned from that church
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
