i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
