She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
whose ass print is on the piano?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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