As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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