Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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