I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
