Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
