we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
