You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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