The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
