i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Randomize
