I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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