that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
