please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am midnight drunk by noon
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
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