"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I still have a little drunk in my system
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
