is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
