Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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