Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Randomize
