To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
