How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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