i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
