I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
