meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
