We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
