Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize