my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I think I won the penis lottery.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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