Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize