I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think I died a long time ago.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
